Transcendental Granola

For those unfamiliar with the Youtube channel You Suck At Cooking, it is mostly silly and humorous but also provides actual recipes you can replicate. The granola made in Episode 43 looked so good I needed to try it myself. This particular episode pokes fun at new age culture and it's wonderfully spot on. Watch the video for a more entertaining walkthrough of how to make the granola.

I have made granola in the past but I'm pretty sure the prospect of dried blueberries and knowing where I could get some gave me the motivation to try it.

I personally don't bother with the pyramid thing but if you want to, go ahead ;)

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RECIPE:

Transcendental Granola
from You Suck at Cooking, episode 43 (July 12, 2016)
Makes about 6 cups

3 cups rolled oats
2 cups nuts, roughly chopped (any kind you like; I used almonds and cashews)
½ cup coconut oil
½ cup pure maple syrup or honey
1 tsp vanilla extract
1 tsp sea salt
2/3 cup dried blueberries or other dried fruit of your choice (optional)

Preheat oven to 350°F. Place oats and nuts in a medium mixing bowl and set aside. In a microwave safe bowl, heat coconut oil in 20-second increments until melted. Remove from microwave and stir in maple syrup or honey, vanilla, and salt. Pour coconut oil mixture over the oats and nuts and stir until evenly coated. Spread onto a rimmed baking sheet.

Bake for 15 minutes. Remove from oven and stir. Return to oven and bake for 15 more minutes, checking every 5 minutes or so to make sure it doesn't get too brown (take it out before the second 15 minutes is up if it starts to get darker than golden brown). Let it cool to room temperature. It will get crispy as it cools.

Once cooled completely, stir in the dried fruit if desired. Store in a glass jar at room temperature. It will keep for several weeks.

Holiday Bakeathon 2016

Holiday baking day #3 and hitting our stride, though we were still at it for nearly 12 hours. We made a lot of truffles this go around and the white chocolate horchata ones I tried to design were an abject failure. White chocolate is so finicky! Someday I will figure it out. Again, we had a mix of old favorites and new ideas to try.

RECIPES

• Spicy Gingerbread Cookies (Smitten Kitchen)
• Cream Cheese Frosting
• Chocolate Caramel Crunch Almonds (Smitten Kitchen) -- these didn't turn out quite right (sandy textured instead of glassy coating, the sugar did not end up melting again despite instruction that it would) but they were still tasty.
• Cranberry-Pistachio Biscotti (Joy of Baking) -- colorful and tasty! We dipped the ends of some in melted white chocolate, the sweetness of which pairs really nicely with the sour cranberry.
• Cinnamon-Sugar Rugelach -- a repeat from last year because we love them.
• Decadent Hot Chocolate Mix (Smitten Kitchen) -- a repeat from years past because it's really good.
• Toasted Coconut Marshmallows (Ina Garten) -- Sarah has made these before and they were just as tasty this time. I kept accidentally burning the coconut because I would get distracted with other baking tasks and forget! I finally got it on the third try, haha. I might crumble the toasted coconut into smaller pieces next time because it didn't stick very well to the marshmallows as large shreds.
• Peanut Butter Balls / Buckeyes (Irvin Lin via Simply Recipes) -- This was my first time ever making them. I had always wanted to try making them ever since seeing my grandma's recipe for them in my mom's collection as a child, but her recipe called for paraffin wax (yikes!) so we did not use it. I think these ended up a little soft, but we used coconut oil instead of dairy butter so they would be vegan, and that might have messed with the texture. I'd absolutely try again though. Make them smaller than you think you would like them, because they're quite rich.
• Dark Chocolate Coconut Truffles (Melanie Stephens, via Feed Your Awesome Machine) -- a repeat from 2014, still love them. Next time I want to roll them in toasted coconut.
• Irish Cream and Coffee Truffles (The Crumby Cupcake) -- delicious. I'd definitely consider making them again. I decided I don't like them coated in bright blue sprinkles though.

BAKEATHONS PAST

• 2015
• 2014

Cinnamon-Sugar Rugelach

There are lots of rugelach recipes out there and I am sure many are good, but this is my personal favorite. A former coworker at a job I had for many years always made these for our year-end work party, and once I told her how much my husband and I liked them she would save extra ones just for us, which was really sweet. We made these once for a holiday baking day at my insistence and Caroline realized these are the same kind of holiday cookies she remembered her grandmother would make, but she never knew the name of and never got a recipe for before she passed away. It feels good to have reintroduced them into her life.

Notes:

• Use the highest quality cinnamon you have since it really shines here. I am partial to Penzey's Vietnamese Cinnamon.
• I have great luck using a plastic pull-apart pizza cutter to cut the rolled out dough.
• I can usually fit 24 of these on a single sheet pan.
• The last step of brushing more melted butter on the finished cookies is 100% unnecessary, but very delicious.
• The cinnamon sugar kind are my favorite, but I have also tried filling these with a number of other things. Omit the cinnamon sugar and walnuts, and try a fruit flavored jam or chocolate-hazelnut spread (such as Nutella) instead for a variation. Warm it slightly in the microwave so that it spreads over the dough more easily. For a more intense fruit flavor, you could use dried fruit.

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RECIPE:

Cinnamon-Sugar Rugelach
from my coworker Anne; makes 48 (4 dozen)

Pastry:
1 package (8 oz) cream cheese, softened
1 cup (2 sticks) unsalted butter, softened
2 cups all-purpose flour
Pinch of salt

Beat cream cheese and butter until well blended. Stir in flour and salt. Divide into 4 equal size discs. Wrap in saran wrap and refrigerate until firm enough to roll (~1-2 hours minimum).

Filling:
Cinnamon sugar: 2/3 cup sugar + 2 tsp cinnamon (you will have extra)
6 tbsp (3/4 stick) butter, melted
1/4 cup walnuts, toasted and finely chopped

Preheat oven to 350°F. Roll out each pastry patty to 10" diameter. Brush with melted butter. Sprinkle the dough with 2 tablespoons cinnamon sugar and 1 tablespoon walnuts. Using a pizza cutter, divide each circle into 12 wedges and roll up from wide end to narrow end; shape into crescent and pinch ends closed. Bake for 25 minutes, or until turning golden brown. When cool enough to handle, brush with remaining melted butter and roll in leftover cinnamon sugar.

Salted Bourbon Pecan Pumpkin Pie

I never used to like pumpkin pie when I was a kid but I have grown to love it as an adult. My family did not make pecan pie so the first time I tried it was at my husband's family reunions. Now that we are old enough to be starting our own Thanksgiving traditions, I decided it was time to try new kinds of pie too (also because my husband doesn't like fruit pies). I decided to give this one a go because it combines two pies that I like...with bourbon! I love the extra layer of flavor that beer, wine, and spirits can give to foods.

I did not use the crust given in the recipe; I replaced it with Smitten Kitchen's All Butter, Really Flaky Pie Dough instead because I know how it behaves and I didn't have buttermilk for the other one. Other than that, it was made as written.

Verdict: This is some god tier pie. If you like pecan and pumpkin pie, it is not to be missed. I made another one about a week after Thanksgiving because I liked it so much. Somehow I don't feel like it turned out quite as good as the first time, but it was still really good.

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RECIPE: All Butter, Really Flaky Pie Dough
RECIPE: Salted Bourbon Pecan Pumpkin Pie

Georgian Dinner Party

We had a dinner party featuring Georgian food. This is Sarah's brainchild and while I am not entirely sure what inspired it (though it was probably Nigella Lawson or Christina Nichol's Lucky Peach blog), it was a fun way to try some new foods I probably never would have found and made on my own. We had at least one vegetarian in attendance and we planned it so that almost all of the food (except the chicken, of course) was vegetarian friendly.

RECIPES

• Georgian Stuffed Chicken -- we cooked a separate batch of the rice stuffing in a glass dish so vegetarians could enjoy it.
• Beet Latkes with Horseradish Cream
• Badrijani Nigvzit (Walnut Stuffed Eggplant Rolls) -- these were my favorite food from the meal! A little labor intensive but really delicious and absolutely worth the work.
• Hachapuri (Cheese Stuffed Bread)
• Muhammara (Red Pepper Walnut Dip) -- I'm not sure of the exact recipe Sarah used to make the one served at our dinner, but I have made the one at this link several times and I love it.
• Dark Grape Pelamushi (Grape Juice Pudding) -- I made this since I had a lot of grapes given to me by our farm share. It turned out more brown than purple, and I am not sure how well executed it was since I had never had it before, but it was fun to try to make something so different. It had a nice sourness from the grape skins and grapey flavor since the grapes had seeds (waaaay different from most American table grapes, which barely have any grape flavor and are mostly just sweet). If I ever make it again I will probably try this recipe instead.

Other things we served that we did not prepare:

• Sartori MontAmore cheese (heart eyes emoji here)
• Olives
• Pita bread
• Khortytsa, a Ukrainian vodka (we couldn't find any Georgian spirits locally to buy)
• Red wine
• Our favorite beers

Dirt Cake

Dirt cake is one of our family dessert staples. Imagine cookies 'n cream ice cream but not quite as cold so you can taste all the delicious flavors. I'm not sure when I first had it, but my mom has been making it all my life. It is a favorite birthday cake of my oldest brother, who was born in January, but we also made it in the summer. My mom still makes it whenever more than one of us comes home to visit. Imagine my surprise at hearing it was my boyfriend's favorite birthday cake too! It is not the only reason I married him but it certainly didn't hurt. He requested it again this year, and we shared this one pictured above at his birthday party.

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RECIPE:

Dirt Cake
from my mom, original source unknown
serves 12-20

20 oz Oreo cookies, crushed
¼ cup (½ stick) butter or margarine, softened
8 oz cream cheese, softened
1 cup powdered sugar
3 ½ cups milk
2 small packages (3.4 oz each) Jello instant French vanilla pudding mix
12 oz Cool Whip, thawed

Put Oreo cookies in a zippered plastic bag and crush into small pieces with a rolling pin. Set aside. Beat butter, cream cheese, and powdered sugar together in a large bowl until thoroughly combined. Set aside. In another large bowl, combine milk and pudding mix with a whisk until completely mixed. Let stand 5 minutes until thickened. Fold in Cool Whip to milk and pudding mixture. Mix pudding mixture into butter mixture until well combined. Layer 1/3 crushed Oreos, ½ cream mixture, 1/3 Oreos, ½ cream mixture, 1/3 Oreos in 9x13 inch rectangular pan. Refrigerate 1-2 hours or until flavors have blended. Store covered in refrigerator.

Notes:

• This recipe was written when standard packages of Oreo cookies were 20 oz. They are now over 25% smaller at 14.3 oz (booooo). You can still make it with one package of cookies but if you really like a lot of cookie crumbs in your dirt cake, consider buying more than one and having some leftovers, or buy another, smaller package.
• If you can't get Oreos where you live, you can substitute a different kind of chocolate sandwich cookie with vanilla cream filling (like Hydrox? Are those still a thing?)
• Do not use non-dairy milk. The pudding will not set.
• You can make this in individual servings too! Instead of putting the whole thing in a 9x13 pan, put a little bit of cookie crumbs in the bottom of a clear plastic cup, top with a few spoonfuls of the cream mixture, then sprinkle more cookie crumbs on top. This will make anywhere from 12-18 servings depending on how much you put in each cup.
• I recommend serving gummy worms/candies on the side if you have the urge to put them in at all. I have discovered I'm a dirt cake purist: no flavored cream (especially chocolate because it competes with the chocolate cookies) and absolutely no gummy worms or candies in it WTF gross. Something about mixing gummy and creamy textures is just really revolting to me and I can't be the only one who feels this way. Plus I imagine children would love the idea of putting their own worms in their dirt cake.

The Green Monk, a matcha green tea cocktail

As I was putting together the menu for a summer tea party, I wanted to make a cocktail with matcha (powdered green tea) in it and came across the Green Monk by (now-defunct) One Cocktail. I ended up not serving it at the party because it looked like a lot of work and I had a lot of other foods to prepare for the party, but I did make it later because I was very curious about how it tasted.

Substitutions:

• Instead of Chartreuse I used Libertine 72 because I already had it and I was not likely to notice the difference with the small amount in the recipe (plus I'm not really into absinthe).
• I used a regular orange instead of a Meyer lemon since I couldn't find Meyer lemons to buy where I live in July.

Verdict: Due to the tremendous amount of work (making your own ginger honey syrup and brewed matcha) and expensive/hard to find ingredients (matcha powder, Chartreuse, vanilla bean, Meyer lemons) for such a small amount I will probably not make it again but I'm glad I tried it because it was quite good. The tiny splash of absinthe really elevates it.

RECIPE: Green Monk

Lavender Lemonade

Continuing on my new obsession with lavender in food, I made Pastry Affair's lavender lemonade. Posting the recipe here because the Wayback Machine link isn't playing nice.

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RECIPE:

Lavender Lemonade
Adapted from Pastry Affair
Makes about 6 cups

5 cups water, divided
3 tbsp culinary lavender buds, dried
1 cup sugar
1 1/2 cups fresh lemon juice, from 6-8 lemons
Lemon slices for garnish (optional)

Boil 1 cup of the water in a small saucepan. Remove from heat and stir in the culinary lavender. Put a lid on the saucepan and let stand for 30 minutes. Strain the mixture with a fine mesh strainer or tea strainer, reserving the liquid. Discard lavender. Allow lavender infusion to cool while you prepare the rest of the ingredients.

Place remaining water (4 cups) and sugar in a second saucepan over high heat, stirring frequently, until all the sugar is dissolved. Remove pan from the heat and allow to cool slightly.

Stir lavender infusion, sugar water, and lemon juice together in a 2-quart pitcher until combined. Allow to cool completely. Store in the refrigerator. Serve with a slice of lemon in each glass.

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This was definitely not pink as the photos on the original recipe make it appear, more pale yellow with a brown-purple tinge. I don't know if this has something to do with the lavender I used. However, it did taste good. The lavender flavor was pleasantly strong, enough to hold its own against the lemon but not overpowering.

To make a simple cocktail I mixed it with citrus flavored vodka, though I imagine plain vodka or gin would also taste nice.

Verdict: I would make this again but probably only for a party or if I had someone around who likes lavender to help me drink it.

Tea Parties Vol. 1: A Birthday Party, and Being Unapologetically Yourself

One of my other hobbies besides cooking is dressing up in an alternative street fashion. One of the things groups of people who are interested in this fashion do is go to tea services while dressed to the nines in fancy, frilly clothes. I had recently left my local community because I felt weird being almost 30 and hanging out with a bunch of high schoolers I wasn't sure I'd ever have crossed paths or be friends with otherwise, and was lamenting the fact that I really wanted to host an event at my house, but wasn't comfortable inviting these people into my home and also felt weird asking my actual friends to come over where I was all dressed up in strange clothes.

Cue Sarah finding out about my fashion hobby and giving me one of the greatest pep talks of my adult life. Indeed she is right. The people who like you already aren't going to abandon you over your taste in clothing, and even if they're not into it personally, they will be happy for you that you're enjoying yourself. I'd read something to this effect and agreed with it before, but I guess I needed someone to say it, out loud, to me specifically.

I then told her about this tea party idea and since we like to cook together, she offered to help me cook for this party. I decided my birthday was a good excuse for the party so I invited my friends and took care of the scheduling and communication, and made drinks and cupcakes and hosted. Sarah made and brought the soup, sablés, gougères and nectarine bars. It was a lovely afternoon.

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RECIPES

• Roasted Corn Gazpacho with Cilantro Crema (from Tara O'Brady's cookbook Seven Spoons)
• Cheddar Cheese Sablés (originally from Chad Robertson's cookbook Tartine Book No. 3; the recipe linked from Scratchin' It is very similar but not the same as the one Sarah made)
• Rye-Cocoa Gougères (originally from Chad Robertson's cookbook Tartine Book No. 3)
• Mocha Cupcakes with Espresso Buttercream Frosting (from Brown Eyed Baker; I additionally topped each one with a chocolate covered espresso bean and chocolate jimmies)
• Nectarine Frangipane Bars (from Smitten Kitchen; Sarah used nectarines instead of rhubarb)
• Matcha Green Tea Mojito
• Spiked Lemonade Iced Tea
• Bonus: Kentucky Tea Julep (from Elmwood Inn; I tested it with a neutral store brand black tea which was probably orange pekoe, and I liked it but we did not end up making them for the party because we had plenty of other drinks)

Other things we served that were not made from scratch:

• Various fancy cheeses
• Wine

Matcha Green Tea Mojito

For our inaugural tea party menu, we looked for summery cocktails that contained tea since they sounded a lot more refreshing than hot tea in the middle of July. I wanted one with black tea and one with green tea, and I chose this one for the green tea drink!

Notes:

• The original recipe calls for 1.5-2 fl oz of the green tea syrup. I used 1.5 fl oz and even then it tasted quite sweet to me, so I recommend 1.5 oz. You can add more if you like it sweeter.
• I like a strong green tea taste so I doubled the amount of matcha from the original recipe.
• The original recipe says to muddle the mint, but people have a wide variety of ideas as to how muddling should be done. The goal of muddling is so that the mint releases its flavor, but what most people want and find pleasant to taste is the sweet, cool aromatic compounds in the oil just below the surface of the leaf, and not the bitter vegetal flavors you might get in addition from tearing or mashing the leaves. Clapping the mint between my hands has been the most successful way for me to achieve the sweet, cool mint flavor I am looking for in my drinks, so I recommend doing that instead, especially if you don't have a proper muddler or professional bartender training. (Plus, it makes your hands smell good.)

Verdict: Mojitos are not something I have often because they require simple syrup and fresh mint (neither of which I generally have on hand) and I don't think I've ever made or had one that really knocked my socks off. That said, this was my favorite attempt yet. I found this refreshing and would definitely have it again.

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RECIPE:

Matcha Green Tea Mojito
adapted from 40 Aprons
Serves 1

For each drink:
5 fresh mint leaves, rinsed and dried, plus extra if desired for garnish
1.5 fl oz (45 ml) matcha simple syrup, recipe follows
2 fl oz (60 ml) white rum
1 fl oz (30 ml) plain vodka
About 3/4-1 cup crushed ice
Club soda or plain sparkling water
Green tea bag tags (optional, for garnish)

Matcha simple syrup (makes enough for 2 drink servings):
1/3 cup (67 g) sugar
1/3 cup (80 ml) water
1 tsp matcha

Make the matcha simple syrup: Place sugar and water in a small saucepan over high heat on the stove, and stir until the sugar is completely dissolved. Remove from heat. Measure matcha into a small heatproof bowl. Add about 2 tsp of the sugar syrup to the matcha and stir to make a paste, making sure it is thoroughly blended (matcha will not dissolve). Repeat with another small amount of sugar syrup. Whisk in the remaining sugar syrup until thoroughly combined, then let cool completely. If not using immediately, store in the refrigerator in a clean glass jar.

Prepare the drink: Clap the mint leaves between your hands to release their aroma, then place in the bottom of a collins glass. Add matcha syrup, rum, and vodka, and stir until combined. Fill glass about 2/3 full with coarsely crushed ice, then top with club soda or sparkling water. Garnish with a sprig of mint and/or tea bag tag. Serve immediately.

Spiked Lemonade Iced Tea

For our inaugural tea party menu, we looked for summery cocktails that contained tea since they sounded a lot more refreshing than hot tea in the middle of July. I wanted one with black tea and one with green tea, and Sarah chose this one for the black tea drink! If you like the combination of black tea and lemon, you'll almost certainly love this.

Notes:

• I used New Amsterdam citrus vodka.
• For further variation, you could try a different fruit flavored vodka or a fruit flavored black tea that goes well with citrus and tea (berry flavors in particular sound nice).
• I made the tea concentrate part ahead (this is especially convenient if you have limited fridge space so you don't have to store a whole pitcher) and finished making the lemonade the next day, right before the gathering at which I served it.
• You will want to let the ice cubes melt a bit to water it down, otherwise it's going to be VERY strong. Alternatively, you could add less vodka if you want a less boozy beverage.

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RECIPE:

Spiked Lemonade Iced Tea
adapted from Tea & Candles and inspired by The Lemon Bowl
Serves 6

4 neutral flavored black tea bags, or about 3 tbsp loose leaf black tea
3/4 cup (6 fl oz, about 175 ml) boiling water
1/3 cup granulated sugar or honey
1/4 cup freshly squeezed lemon juice
1 1/2 cups (12 fl oz, 350 ml) citrus flavored or plain vodka
Ice

In a small heatproof bowl, steep tea in boiling water for 5-7 minutes, or up to 10 minutes if you like strong tea. Remove or strain out and discard tea bags/leaves. Add sugar or honey and stir until dissolved. Let cool until the bowl is cool enough to handle, then refrigerate until chilled. Transfer the tea mixture to a pitcher. Add lemon juice and vodka and stir to combine. Add about a tray's worth of ice cubes (~14 cubes) and mix to combine. Serve immediately.

Emeril's Flourless Chocolate Cake

I was asked if I might be willing to make a gluten free cake for a coworker's retirement party, and was told that she really liked flourless chocolate cake. I accepted because A) I like this person and B) I had just the recipe in mind and it was a perfect excuse to make and eat this cake.

Admittedly I have only tried one other flourless cake recipe in my life, but I like Emeril's flourless chocolate cake recipe so much that I don't feel like I need to go looking for another. This one is fudgy and has an intense chocolate flavor, probably because there's an entire pound of chocolate in it, but is not overly sweet. If chocolate had the texture of butter, it would be this cake, and you won't find me complaining about it.

Notes:

• The recipe allegedly serves 16 but I think that's a generous estimate because it's very dense and rich. If you've served an entire meal before this it will probably feed more people, especially if they don't have big appetites to begin with. I served it to a group of 25 people who were mostly light eaters, and we still had leftovers.
• For serving: I topped it with a dusting of powdered sugar and fresh raspberries and blackberries, as shown in the picture.
• If you are averse to putting alcohol in your cake or don't have any Kahlua, you can substitute espresso or strong coffee.
• I used semisweet chocolate chips for part of the chocolate but I would definitely use the highest quality real chocolate you can find (I have learned there's such a thing as chocolate *flavored* chips. What are they made out of?).

RECIPE: Flourless Chocolate Cake